TWO OBSERVATIONS
MINI-ESSAY
Hello, greetings from me and you are reading Busyminds newsletter. Welcome to a new week. This publication is brief and straight to the point.
I just want to share some observations I have made over the past few weeks. I hope you catch the flow and move with the ideas.
Note: This is not MY FASCINATING FINDS.
OBSERVATION ONE: AN INVERTED WORLD
OK, so I think the internet and social media is messing us up in a way we cannot see. I name the phenomenon I am about to describe as "the inverted world." I don't intend to mince words, so I will just let it fly.
The way we deal with problems and trauma in the social media age is problematic. We tend to overshare. What do I mean? Sharing is good. Be it sharing your joy, or sharing your pain. Sharing makes it easier to enjoy life and manage pain. Sharing is the premise of all relationships. But there is a big problem when we begin to overshare. And there is a bigger problem when we share in the wrongest way possible.
It is problematic when people have good news and their first impulse is to let it all out to the world audience. The internet has amplified our attention-seeking nature but also remember, the internet never forgets what you put there. But what I find more absurd is when people share their personal pain and trauma to their world audience and automatically think they are entitled to some coddling and sympathy. It is just absurd.
The real order to sharing your story is first to your known friends and family. It should always begin there. After that, you need to prioritise your mental or physical recovery. I can boldly tell that anyone who skips these two steps and jumps to let the world know first is living in an inverted world. And they are not interested in healing as much as they are interested in gaining attention. It is a subtle form of narcissism when you think strangers on the internet owe you some oohs and aahs. Some go as far as making enemies with those who show skepticism at their stories. Well, no one truly owes you sympathy. If you want to heal, get with your loved ones and let them help you. Stop living an inverted life.
The inverted world leaves things worse than better. You may gain all the attention you need without being healed. So we will be left with an unhealthy deposit of people who crave attention without seeking healing. Such people won't mind being in traumatic situations just to get more attention. I remembered these words a few days ago: "Clout is a drug." Like cocaine, people get addicted to global attention and like addicts, they will expend anything to get it; even common sense.
We must revert to how things were. Start in the right place. Talk to your loved ones. Let them help you. Heal from all your trauma. Then, tell us about it because you most genuinely want to help and show the way. Share but don't overshare.
OBSERVATION TWO: LIFE'S SNOOZE BUTTON
I reckon that we are pretty great at making discoveries as a species. We have discovered lots of awesome stuff. But again and again, we seem to fall short of what matters the most: ourselves.
I noticed that people would rather do the many wrong things than the few right ones. I don't mean this like sin and holiness. But as a matter of busyness and accuracy. We would rather be busy than precise. And this costs us a lot. As a matter of duty, I try to work against the grain. I want to be precise, not busy. Being busy instead of precise costs you the creativity of your soul. It crushed the spirit of man.
Busyness over precision may come as a result of many factors. But my favorite thing to point out is that we would rather do things than live with ourselves. If you are going to be precise, you should learn how to live with yourself. But we would rather gobble up what works for others while our own compasses die within us. This shouldn't be so. People would rather have hot passionate sex than tell their partner what they are bothered about. Eventually, there will be a collapse. And it is always so difficult to rebuild because you are buried under the pile. So, learn to live with yourself. Learn how you can become interesting (Read my last publication for more on that).
Don't snooze through life with many activities. Know when your soul is numb and give it some due refreshing.
SIGN OUT NOTE:
The world is always changing. But there is one thing that never changes; human nature. If you don't learn human nature, you will be sold out on some ideals that will bite you hard. Don't let that happen to you.
Seek help from those that matter. Not everyone can help you. But if there is any way Busyminds can help, shoot us an email. It was great reaching out.
Quit snoozing through life. Make every moment count and find yourself.
Listen to my most recent podcast. I speak on Life Lessons from a movie and how some of the best things that can happen to you come from the strangest places. Adios.
Nice basic breakdown on how to deal with "trauma pornographers" versus dealing with those stuck within trauma.
> The real order to sharing your story is first to your known friends and family. It should always begin there. After that, you need to priorities your mental or physical recovery.
Second step goes first if the friends and family are indeed "to poisonous to fix". Therapeutics first, then deal with immaturity in the family by having the higher ground. Have better friends and support network is a plus too... One may conjecture it can become a stuck problem of "finding support networks without internet", but most support network sites are by private contact or protected charity basis. Why would someone announce it on the internet in the first place!?
> I can boldly tell that anyone who skips these two steps and jumps to let the world know first is living in an inverted world. And they are not interested in healing as much as they are interested in gaining attention.
Here is where is where I start to suspect a secondary problem: the "narcissists" in fact has the mental fortitude to endure the suffering by themselves without help, whilst at the same time siphoning away attention from those with empathy, who is originally prepared to give it to those with real needs. This is the secular equivalent of stealing from the offering basket, and most charitable men will let it happen on the basis of good will. https://archive.ph/pkq9o
Then again if someone want to chase "clout" and stir drama, the ultimate result is to convert it into monetary and marketing value (think comedians and their borderline fabricated stories), and that there is likely no soul to save or inversion to escape, for someone who is of sound mind knowing that the whole thing is a con. Just like how you can't wake someone who is asleep.
Q: Is a cultural shift against this even possible? Or should people just focus on their community instead of the "open internet"? What are the type of people who would fall for these schemes, and how should one help such hyper-sympathetic individuals?