Sovereign Love
Unconditional love by its true name
It is, in our deeply cynical times, now quite common to argue against the possibility of unconditional love. Many suppose unconditional love to be impossible or unrealistic due to the presence and abundance of parasites. They argue that unconditional love, were it possible, provides parasites a fertile breeding ground to, well, parasitise. They suppose that a termless bill of love is a fruitful field for parasites to vandalise. And as such, if we do not want a world of parasites and evil men, love cannot be unconditional. That it must be earned one way or another. But this is a fine way to miss the point.
The point being that it is only unconditional love that does the true job of exposing parasites. Due to what is called “the debt of love.”
The “debt of love” is an intuitive and axiomatic impulse of the human heart which, upon receiving love undemanded, is immediately discomfited and unnerved, and angles to reciprocate this show of love and affection. This is to say that the human —homo sapiens— as a formal category is constituted towards the giving and receiving of love. Love is a fundamental need and a duty. As such, all of his being, well constituted and integrated, orients itself towards the show of love. Of which a show of love towards him stirs and ought to stir within him a welling stream of love. A debt of love is thus created in him by an initial show of love, from which he is propelled and compelled to show to others as well.
Because then love stirs love as an automatic function of love itself, our first and natural —and might we say healthy— response is to return this love; to settle this “debt of love” when we receive love unsolicited. Which consequently creates a healthy competition and a never-settled cycle of the debt of love. Therefore, we can say that the human heart, in an unbroken state, is perfectly primed for unconditional love. Owing to this “debt of love” that opens up on our account to unconditional love, we have the conditions for unconditional love.
And this is good. That our hearts create a debt of love. For this is how we know parasites: that no “debt of love” opens on the ledger of their hearts. No well springs forth from a parasite’s heart. The hearts of parasites are like a parched desert land that sinks water without a trace and gives nothing in return. For when a healthy heart, upon receiving love, by default plans how it might reciprocate, the parasite's heart feels no such anxiety. And this is how we know his heart is wicked. When you receive a huge show of love, parasitic acts become a revealer of a person's heart.
When a receiver of a show of love chooses to exploit rather than reciprocate this show of love, they show themselves to be broken —since they lack the axiom of reciprocity. And here ‘broken’ is a mild term to use for such a person. The more accurate term is “wicked.”
Parasitism is wickedness. But even wicked people can hide their despicableness under the banner of transactional love. But when a lover comes asking for nothing in return, a parasite is forced to give up the true posture of his heart.
Yet, I do not suppose those who think unconditional love is unrealistic will find this convincing. That is because the term “unconditional” is often misleading. Let us retire the term “unconditional love” and use the term “Sovereign Love” instead. For this better describes the type of love which we here consider.
For characteristically, love is unconditional or sovereign because the recipient of this love does nothing to earn it. It is a love freely given as an act of the will by the giver. It is the giver who determines, by his own rational will, to extend good volition to the recipient. And “good volition” is here important for us to zoom into. For “good volition” is merely two words to describe “benevolence,” itself taken from the Latin terms “bene” which means good, and “volentia,” which means will.
Supposing then that love is willing another's good, it is simply realistic and practical that we can extend “good willing” to someone else regardless of their previous actions. Whether or not they have done anything to earn it. Thus, it is a sovereign love because it sits firmly within one's rule to exercise regardless of external circumstances —whether parasite or not; whether chummy or not.
Friends, let us consider this term Sovereign Love and observe how we may rationally will someone's good whether they deserve it or not. We must not fear for parasites, for we don't truly know them just until we have first loved them. And maybe one day parasites will see the wickedness in their own hearts and repent; everybody wins. And even if they do not repent, you don't lose. Valete!
Happy Birthday to the (vain) author.
This is so good!
Hbd brother !!